Control for Kids

As is the case with most children who suffer from bipolar disorder/adhd my dd9 has a strong need for two things: consistency and control. We got to the point where we were both sick and tired of the nagging! Then in a stroke of genius my dd9 says to me, “Mom, why don’t you make me a Control Journal like yours? Then I will know what to do by myself.” OK, why didn’t I think of that? (sidebar note:a Control Journal is a concept from www.flylady.net This is a notebook that contains your daily, weekly, monthly routines, menus, shopping lists etc) So, we went to Walmart and she picked out her pretty Hannah Montana binder, I picked up page protectors and a new set of dry erase markers. Then I went home to print up her pages. Here is a list of pages in her book:

Morning Routine

Our Home School Schedule

After School Routine

Before Dinner Routine

Before Bed Routine

A page per chore with descriptions down to the last detail of how to complete the chore, a reading list) Her teacher added her homework to a special section in this binder because she carries it 24/7. (this section is now used for the assignments her tutod gives her)

Each page is in a page protector. As she goes though her routines and completes items she crosses them off with the dry erase marker. This is an amazing “tool”! It has increased her feelings of independence and responsibility! She is doing the things she is supposed to without nagging and tears!!!!

This experience with my dd9 served as a strong reminder of what I believe. Medicine only helps so much, therapy only helps so much, school and IEP’s only help so much. It is up to us to pick up the slack. So, starting today, engage in your own NO Child Left Behind Act! What can you do at home to help fulflil the needs your child may not be able to put into words?

Something to consider: This is a “horse and carriage” type of deal. When Jasmeen is unstable, it is very hard to get her to follow her routines, which then makes her more miserable. When she is stable (or at least stable-ish) following these routines helps to cut back on rages and melt downs.

I am considering making up thematic child planners, available personalized to meet individual needs, for a small fee, if  I can find a demand for them. If you would be interested or if you need ideas, please feel free to ask or email at mommylebron@yahoo.com

Meal Plan #FridayFly

Oh, I am so bad! Between the stress of basically a life style change and (to be honest) the complete joy of being home with my daughter,  I have yet to post my meal plan for this week! So, here you go!

 

I like to print the week's meal plan on my big dry earase board!

Sunday: Kalbasa, Red Beans and Rice, and Corn Bread Muffins

Monday: Steaks (grilled on my George Foreman), Baked Potatoes, Bake Beans, Crossaints

Tuesday: Spaghetti, Salad, Fresh Bread

Wednesday: Crock Pot Chili, (left over) Salad, Corn Bread

Thursday: Sweet and Sour Meatballs, Candied Yams, White Rice, CocoNutty Bread (home made)

Friday: Friend Chicken, Mashed Potatoes, White Corn, Biscuits

Saturday: Apple Spice Pork Chops, Yellow Rice, Pink Beans, Puerto Rican Bread

I do like to plan meals weekly to allow for current favorites and seasonal stuff. However, I keep on file a set of 5 menus that are all spelled out and include complete shopping lists.

Related Articles

• Meal Plan Monday: GF Dinners (momblognetwork.com)
• Menu Plan Monday – 4/5 (livingrichwithcoupons.com)
• Menu Plan 9/14 (frugalupstate.com)

#FridayFly Number 2

“What’s for dinner?” used to be a dreaded question for me. And it’s sad really because I love to cook and I’m actually quite good at it! But with a solid plan I lose enthusiasm and end up serving guilt for dinner.

“Fail to plan and plan to fail.”

So here is the challenge:

1. Sit down and write out your meal plan for one week. Be realistic, you don’t have to impress anyone.( I only meal plan dinners during the week and add breakfast and lunch on the weekends. I may need to rethink this appraoch now that LeBella will be home schooled).

2. After your plan is done write out a shopping list to go with it. Write down everything, even if you have it in the pantry. (I reuse my lists)

3. Come back here and add your linky.

4. Visit some FlyFriends and see “What’s for dinner”. Feel free to borrow and share ideas!

5. Grab the Sunday paper and clip coupons before hitting the store(s)!

Now let’s get linky with it!

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Related Articles

• Menu Plan Monday – 4/5 (livingrichwithcoupons.com)
• 5 Simple Ways to Menu Plan (thehappyhousewife.com)
• 5 Simple Ways to Get Dinner on the Table (thehappyhousewife.com)

Wordless Wednesday: BYOB

Bipolar Tuesday: Planning Prevents Pandemonium

Most adults need a little routine. In general children thrive when there is structure. In my reality pandemonium ensues when there is no routine and structure. This is a rule without exception. For a long time I convinced myself I was the Queen of Winging It. And anyone who knows me IRL will tell you I can run crisis control like a mofo. Why? Simple: Practice makes perfect.
As LeBella’s IEP began coming together I realized I needed to be doing more at home. I decided to start with myself, so I could lead by example. After only a few creative Google searches (“How to be a Good Mom” “Supermom” “How to be a Housewife” “Being Organized” “How not to end up in an Insane Asylum”) I came across FlyLady and I was instantly hooked! (But that’s a post for another day!) I began pulling myself together, and then I focused on everyone else.
I came up with a chore chart for the kids. I took the 6 simplest chores and set it up so they each did 2 a day. The chores rotate daily so every does every chore at least twice during the week. They kids actually loved this! That was about 4 years ago. We still have the very same chore chart up on the fridge but the kids know the rotation by heart.
I also began setting up a weekly plan. We always run errands and go to doctor’s appointments on Mondays, for instance. We do groceries on Sunday afternoons. I try to avoid “running around” everyday. It makes LeBella very anxious.
We have set daily schedules. Meal time, homework time, outside play; everything is planned and everyone knows what to expect. I worried that we were living too structured, but even our daily schedule has “down time” included. When we deviate from our set routines EVERYbody notices.
LeBella has her own “Princess Planner” which is an adaptation of FlyLady’s Control Journal that I prettied up with some clip art and scrap booking materials. Inside her pretty 3-ring binder she has all her routines in page protectors so she can mark them of with a dry erase marker as she goes through the day.
We also meal plan every week and place meals (and any other important info) on our large dry erase calendar. It sounds like a lot when you break it down but really, we’re talking minutes of planning that prevents hours of chaos!

If you are raising a child like LeBella I cannot stress the importance of having set routines. You will find yourself with fewer battles to pick from and your will be building your child’s independence and self-esteem in a natural way. You are also teaching your child time management. A very important Life Skill. And the bonus? You will be less stressed. At times your house will feel like it runs itself.
Routines create a sense of security in your home. When children can predict what’s happening next they are less anxious and more compliant. Have a set routine for children to follow boost their sense of independence and raises self-esteem. I want our home to be an oasis, a safe place to escape from the craziness of the world. Behind these doors my family is safe and secure, and that’s how they should feel.

For more ideas on creating your own routines visit:
www.flylady.net
www.homeroutines.com

http://organizedhome.com/household-notebook/

http://www.totallytogetherjournal.com/the-daily-7-for-a-highly-successful-household/

http://www.habithacker.com

*Interested in a custom planner for your child(ren)? Email me for more information: mommylebron@yahoo.com

Here’s where all the hoppin’ is happenin’ (if you’d like to follow me via GFC there’s a link to the right *pointing->*)

Posted with love by Mommylebron